3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
Randomize
