Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
i think i scared a bird with my dick
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
