so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize