Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
