Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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