you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Randomize
