Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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