Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
