His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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