So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
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