That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
now i know why i became what i already was.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize