dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize