Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
She even gives head with a lisp.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Randomize
