thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Randomize
