He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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