I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
