he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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