i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
It was a blind-side dick pic.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
Randomize
