so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
