I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
I just gift wrapped bread.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
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