Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
We need to rekindle our bromance
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Randomize
