"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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