My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize