In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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