oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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