Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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