dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
