let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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