question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Randomize
