It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
How does one acquire holy water?
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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