Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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