Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
