I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
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