we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize
