1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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