Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
