Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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