OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
