i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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