found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
