He asked to "fluff my boner.."
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
