Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
I see more hoeing in ur future
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