the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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