We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize