I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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