Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
