And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
meet me or not, i'm out of control
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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