So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
