Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
