Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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