fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize
